My adoptive parents are good people and good parents. They raised me well, they treated me nicely, and they always gave me everything I needed. They taught me great values and started me off on the way to living a great life. So they were surprised when I wanted to search adoption records to find out who my birth parents were. You see, alot of people are aware that adopted kids have issues, but not alot of people understand how many issues adoptive parents have as well. In my family, I think that my parents are more afraid of me rejecting them than I am of them rejecting me. Needless to say, the adoption public records search was not an easy thing to do.

For most adopted kids, searching adoption records is almost a rite of passage. It is difficult to explain why we need to do it, but we do. I think it has something to do with the power of secrets. If you don't know where you come from, it holds a certain kind of mysterious power over you. You obsess over it and wonder over it. If you can find adoption records, however, suddenly that power is diffused. Even if you dislike your birth parents, it really doesn't matter that much. Just having met them and solved the mystery has a sort of healing effect.

The problem is, the state doesn't always make it easy for somebody to find adoption records. Adoption court records are often sealed until they reach 18 years old, both for the protection of the adopted children and the parents. Once you become an adult, it can still be pretty tough tracking down your parents. If they have changed adress, changed their names, or just disappeared off the grid you will never find them. Parents who put kids up for adoption are not, as a rule, the most reliable people in the world. Aside from that, most of them feel guilty about the decision and don't want to be located.

It took me around two years doing adoption record searches, But in the end I finally found them. It was a pretty powerful moment for me, and I was anxious, as were they. When we met, however, we got along good. Not great, but good. It was cordial and friendly, but they don't really feel like my folks. My birth parents are my acquaintances and nothing more.